当一切都背弃了你

@猫鱼  July 25, 2018

今天偶然看了一期董卿主持的《朗读者》,主题是『痛苦』。其中宁浩导演分享了他当年拍《绿草地》时在边境草原的艰辛历程,并朗读了加拿大女诗人奥雷阿的《生活的邀请函》。其中的句子深深地触动了我,这两天刚好被突发的一些事情而烦心,感觉曾经美满的生活似乎背弃了自己,曾经视如港湾的父母变得那么的陌生,我该怎么办,我将要去何方?就将《生活的邀请函》摘录于此,权当作是回答和自勉吧:

生活的邀请函
——奥雷阿(加拿大)

我不在乎你如何谋生,
只想知道你有何渴望,
是否敢追逐心中梦想。

我不关心你年方几何,
只想知道面对爱情和梦想,
你是否会无所保留,
像个傻瓜般投入得透彻。

生命的背叛,
在你心口上划开缺口,
热情逐日消减,恐惧笼罩心田,

我想知道,你能否和伤痛共处,
用不着掩饰,或刻意忘却,更别把它封堵。
我想知道,你能否和快乐共舞,
翩翩起舞,无拘无束,从嘴唇,到指尖,
到脚趾头都把热情倾注。

这一刻,
忘记谨小慎微,现实残酷,忘记生命的束缚。
我想知道,你能否从每天平淡的点滴中发现美丽,
能否从生命的迹象中寻找到自己生命的意义。

我想知道,你能否坦然面对失败,
——你的或者我的,
即使失败,也能屹立湖畔,
对着一轮银色满月呼喊:“我可以!”

我想知道,
当悲伤和绝望整夜踯躅,
当疲倦袭来,伤口痛彻入骨,
你能否再次爬起来,为生活付出。

我不关心你认识何人,为什么在此处。
我想知道,生命之火熊熊燃烧时,
你是否敢和我一起,
站在火焰中央,凛然不怵。

我不关心你在哪里受什么教育,
我想知道,当一切都背弃了你,是什么将你支撑着前行。

我想知道,你是否经受得住孤独,
空虚时,你是否真正热爱独处。

原文 via Oriah Mountain Dreamer

The Invitation
by Oriah

It doesn’t interest me
what you do for a living.
I want to know
what you ache for
and if you dare to dream
of meeting your heart’s longing.

It doesn’t interest me
how old you are.
I want to know
if you will risk
looking like a fool
for love
for your dream
for the adventure of being alive.

It doesn’t interest me
what planets are
squaring your moon...
I want to know
if you have touched
the centre of your own sorrow
if you have been opened
by life’s betrayals
or have become shrivelled and closed
from fear of further pain.

I want to know
if you can sit with pain
mine or your own
without moving to hide it
or fade it
or fix it.

I want to know
if you can be with joy
mine or your own
if you can dance with wildness
and let the ecstasy fill you
to the tips of your fingers and toes
without cautioning us
to be careful
to be realistic
to remember the limitations
of being human.

It doesn’t interest me
if the story you are telling me
is true.
I want to know if you can
disappoint another
to be true to yourself.
If you can bear
the accusation of betrayal
and not betray your own soul.
If you can be faithless
and therefore trustworthy.

I want to know if you can see Beauty
even when it is not pretty
every day.
And if you can source your own life
from its presence.

I want to know
if you can live with failure
yours and mine
and still stand at the edge of the lake
and shout to the silver of the full moon,
“Yes.”

It doesn’t interest me
to know where you live
or how much money you have.
I want to know if you can get up
after the night of grief and despair
weary and bruised to the bone
and do what needs to be done
to feed the children.

It doesn’t interest me
who you know
or how you came to be here.
I want to know if you will stand
in the centre of the fire
with me
and not shrink back.

It doesn’t interest me
where or what or with whom
you have studied.
I want to know
what sustains you
from the inside
when all else falls away.

I want to know
if you can be alone
with yourself
and if you truly like
the company you keep
in the empty moments.

By Oriah © Mountain Dreaming,
from the book The Invitation


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